lessons

Warning: Its typical deep crap, start reading at your own risk; don’t curse me later.

Too many lessons in too little period of time; and some conclusions about almost half of the human population (might not hold for everyone; since they are based on my personal experience).

Clock is about to tick 3, still I am sleepless; even watching 3 episodes of Prison break didn't help the thoughts crawling in my mind. Night is literally miserable, when I got another lesson about people from the neighboring planet. I agree that making mistakes is the best way to learn, but Lord I don’t want to have these lessons anymore. Its not that I have learnt everything I need to; it is just that I am afraid of the pain one has to suffer as a tuition fee to these lessons.

Well as usual I sound too abstract, but I am helpless. Having friends and then holding them aren’t easy, at least for me. May be it is me who is the originator of the mess every time, but I am sure I am innocent. I have always been fool to trust and believe people so soon. I don’t mean to say someone else is at fault, but me neither. And why do I have to suffer, when people at other end have no idea of how much humiliation one has to feel due to their immature or childlike behavior.

So the moral of the story: May be I just need to manipulate myself a little, the way I handle things, the way I behave with people. A little more disciplined, civilized behavior, with a tint of diplomacy and reserved attitude (something I actually hate) and pretension of being busy. Henceforth it will be difficult to be the usual friendly, chattering and giggling deep. As a desire to be more acceptable social person, it is better just being deep. May be it is not feasible to be our own selves, the original beings. When people around behaved like this I always wondered and questioned them, but now I understand, how this they were more appropriate.

Original is outdated, you see that.. :(

dil no more has to be a bachcha..just grow up..

PS: Now as you have come to the end, the only word left to say is I hated writing this here, as much as you hated reading; but somehow it was necessary.